PLOD OF THE YARD

I am sure that many readers have been glued to their seats in front of the TV in recent days as the revelations about Murdoch’s iffy empire poured in and his bid for BSkyB unravelled.


However one man actually made me fall out of my seat. He was Andy Hayman who incredibly was a former Met assistant commissioner and was in overall charge of the 2006 investigation.

He was up before the House of Commons Home Affairs Committee and one of the MPs, Lorraine Fullbrook, described him as a “dodgy geezer”. Which is ironic as the chairman of the committee, the senior Labour MP Keith Vaz, has had his collar felt numerous times by the House of Commons authorities. As of yet Hayman is as straight as a dye till he’s ever found to be bent as a cork screw.

Hayman’s problem is he is a Cockney. Well many of us were born in the “Smoke” but few of us sound like extras playing small time crooks in an episode of Arthur Daley’s Minder.

Within months of leaving the force Hayman took a job with The Times, one of Murdoch’s upmarket organs. Not only did he see nothing wrong with this given the fact the Met have been investigating News International one has to wonder how if Hayman “can’t talk proper” he manages to write.

He told the committee his boyhood dream was to be either a journalist or a copper. A dream for him, a nightmare for both professions!

He also admitted he had enjoyed dinners with News International staff despite conducting an investigation into their behaviour although he wasn’t quite sure when the dinners took place. “It could look bad,” he admitted, “It does look bad.”

Hayman even had the nerve to mock the former Labour Deputy Prime Minister John Prescott’s complaints about phone-hacking saying he’d eat his words if the claims were true. I would have thought the verbally challenged Hayman and Prescott had much in common and as Prescott’s claims have been shown to be true we all await Plod of the Yard’s paper eating feat. I guess we have to wait for him to extract his ‘daisy roots’ from his mouth first.

There are allegations that police officers had been bribed and all those appearing before the Committee were asked if they had accepted any iffy cash. The previous two officers replied firmly they had not. Hayman lost his cool: “Good God!” he yelled, “I'm not letting her get away with it! I can’t believe you asked that!” She, the doughty Lorraine Fullbrook had, and his response suggested this man doth protest too much!

Having watched Hayman before the committee it would be easy to image him as a DI down the local nick. What is as shocking as the Murdoch revelations is that Plod of the Yard was one of the Met’s most senior officers. Pot Pourri! As Del Boy would say!