TILTING AT WINDMILLS: I’M RICH

Sunday, April 5, 2009

I’M RICH – AT LAST!

Good news readers! I am now rich beyond my dreams. Of course I want to celebrate with you so don’t hold back on the begging letters.

When I checked in to my emails this morning:

Mr Bernard West says I can have 40 per sent of US Dollars 232,000,000 if I just send him my bank details.

Dr Richard Williams tells me I can share in 15,000,000 sterling locked in a bank in Nigeria.

The Camelot Group informs me I have won 891,934 in sterling.

In the Siemens draw I have scooped 750,000 pounds.

There’s more!

In the Swiss National Lottery, which oddly has an address in Birmingham, I have clocked up another cool million pounds.

Microsoft has decided to give me 891,934 in sterling. About right for all the heart ache its software has caused me but it is curiously the same amount as Camelot want to give me!

Another doctor, this time Harry Raymonds, informs me 1,532,720 (doesn’t say what currency) is mine in the UK lottery monthly promo.

And last, but certainly not least, the Irish National Lottery Board is handing over 1,801,613 euros.

Not bad for a morning’s work. I haven’t totalled it up but at a guess it is a few bob more than British Home Secretary, Jacqui Smith, claims for renting “adult” movies.

Rest assured I am still the same humble and approachable hack that I was this morning before I went to my inbox. So don’t treat me with any more awe that you normally do. However the doffing of your ‘titfer’ or a slight curtsey will not go amiss.

2 comments:

Cybernest said...: ha ha! Nice one Sancho... they are a damn plague those scam and SPAM emails!

Thankfully, my Kaspersky Anti Spam proggie is very effective in controlling them... safely filtering them out of my inbox into my 'spam folder'. At under a tenner per annum... a good anti virus prog like Kaspersky is invaluable!

Which reminds me, incidentally... I mentioned you in a post yesterday... Don Quixote is alive and well and 'tilting at Gibraltar windmills'. See my little disclaimer at the bottom of that post. I mention it here... a little 'off topic' in case you missed it... but there is a connection in regards to people avoiding SPAM and ensuring good filtering and avoiding unwanted emails!

Have a peaceful Sunday all!

Saludos! :); April 5, 2009 at 4:58 PM
Anonymous said...: I have a spam folder full of these... There's one I received today that's titled 'Copulate like a rabbit'!! It's in with other such frightening items.
As for winning every spurious jackpot, I've won 'em all.; April 9, 2009 at 1:10 PM

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TILTING AT WINDMILLS

Sancho Panza is much less learned but a good deal saner than his master.

"At this point they came in sight of thirty or forty windmills that are on that plain.

"Fortune," said Don Quixote to his squire, as soon as he had seen them, "is arranging matters for us better than we could have hoped. Look there, friend Sancho Panza, where thirty or more monstrous giants rise up, all of whom I mean to engage in battle and slay, and with whose spoils we shall begin to make our fortunes. For this is righteous warfare, and it is God's good service to sweep so evil a breed from off the face of the earth."

"What giants?" said Sancho Panza.

"Those you see there," answered his master, "with the long arms, and some have them nearly two leagues long."

"Look, your worship,'' said Sancho. "What we see there are not giants but windmills, and what seem to be their arms are the vanes that turned by the wind make the millstone go."

"It is easy to see," replied Don Quixote, "that you are not used to this business of adventures. Those are giants, and if you are afraid, away with you out of here and betake yourself to prayer, while I engage them in fierce and unequal combat."”